Once upon a time, central Illinois became home for numerous Italians seeking the American dream. This was lost on me during a recent assignment at the Farmington Italian Festival.

more photos from the Journal Star

“Boo-chi balls”
Amazingly, even the announcer used this pronunciation. We all make these mistakes, but this one was odd; “bocci” only has one “o.” Thus… | ?bä ch ? |

The One-man Bearded Band
An incredible show of talent, I must say. With his enormous rig of keyboards and drum machines, he singularly crafted a sonic assault never to be forgotten. It could have been Red, from “The Red Green Show.” Busting out such family favorites as Whitney Houston’s indomitable “I Will Always Love You” and sexual favorite Big & Rich’s “Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy,” he worked the audience like Wayne Newton. Everyone was uncomfortable, but not willing to leave. A 50-car crash, of sorts.

Spaghetti and Fries
Announcement: “Every kid who enters the spaghetti eating contest gets a free hamburger and fries from McDonalds!” The Golden Arches of Sicily, I’m guessing.

Yet…
I still had a fleeting taste of the authentic… Bagna Càuda. A woman had a booth at the festival, selling the garlic and anchovy dip made from a recipe her late father perfected. And he, my friends, was pure Italian.