My Netflix queue has become somewhat of a running joke among friends. And it’s for good reason, I assure you. Since May of this year, I’ve tightly held onto ‘The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.’ I am Linus, and this is my security blanket.

I hear gasps, yes, but it’s true. Originally a movie I intended to see in the theater, it was quickly bumped to the top of my queue 6 months ago right as I moved into my new apartment. I mean, you just don’t ignore a movie that gets a 92 on metacritic.com. But like many who’ve had trouble with certain movie downers, it’s sat under my TV for half a year, through a summer that I still need to write about, a TV that was replaced, and friends that were lost (although not in a deathly way.)

So maybe it was the needle-like sleet that hit me the entire way home, or the fading traction of my car on the slick pavement, but tonight I accomplished something half a year in the making. Sadly, it’s just a movie. Loser.